Anonymous asked: my therapist (whom I love but can be a ditz sometimes) basically was like "oh you have all the symptoms of bpd but you don't have bpd" so idk if me saying I have bpd is like a me self diagnosing. I know how frustrating it is for some people to see other self diagnose a mental disorder and I honestly don't really know what to do about it.
Answer: It’s true some people are anti self-dx, but SBD isn’t. If you want to call yourself borderline, by all means. But I still understand if you don’t want to!
If you feel comfortable doing so, ask your therapist why they aren’t giving you the diagnosis, especially if they agree you have all of the symptoms. There are many reasons a therapist may not give you a diagnosis. Sometimes, health insurance won’t cover the disorder. Sometimes, health clinics have a policy to not deal with personality disorders, so this could be your therapist’s way of keeping you in therapy and getting you the help you need. (I was “undiagnosed” with BPD once for this reason, in which the therapist was like, “You don’t have BPD, just the symptoms *wink wink nudge nudge*”). Sometimes, a therapist is still exploring other possible diagnoses and seeing if maybe another personality disorder fits you better and doesn’t want to assign a label until they know for sure.
Otherwise, you can always self-identify as “with borderline symptoms” if you prefer. PDNOS with borderline traits is a valid description and is more or less your diagnosis at this point, but it’s up to you how you identify.